


And So They Ask For Marriage

by StevetheIcecube



Category: Xenoblade Chronicles 2
Genre: Coming Out, F/F, Internalized Homophobia, Politics, Royal Politics
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-16
Updated: 2018-01-16
Packaged: 2019-03-05 15:11:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,264
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13390491
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/StevetheIcecube/pseuds/StevetheIcecube
Summary: A senator makes a suggestion for Mòrag's future and it gets her thinking about herself.-“A Senator suggested I marry,” she said. Brighid jumped, immediately raising her eyes from her book and fixing them on Mòrag’s face. “During the meeting. He said that I should ‘take steps to secure the dynasty’.”





	And So They Ask For Marriage

Mòrag hated Senate meetings. She hated them with a passion. She didn’t enjoy diplomacy or politics or any of that. She could struggle through it, barely, for the sake of assisting the Emperor, but she hated it. The people here didn’t want her to be here. She took up a seat in the Senate and all they saw her as was a pretty ornament they could fling at things to kill them. They couldn’t use her politically because she was too close to Niall to pull away, which was just a problem for them. She didn’t fit into their game because she was actually useful to the Empire.

“I have a proposal I believe could be beneficial to the Empire,” one said. It was Senator Harret. He always had something interesting to say, even if he rarely made a valuable suggestion. His lengthy waffling at least prevented harmful people from speaking.

“You may speak, Senator Harret,” the Emperor said, and the man stood and moved to the centre of the floor.

“I ask you stop me, Your Majesty, if I speak out of turn,” he said, and that was when Mòrag knew that this was going to be a problematic session. “It pertains to the current marital status of Special Inquisitor Mòrag. I understand that in the past, her Lady has preferred to remain removed from marital politics to better protect his Majesty. It may be a little presumptuous, but due to the difficulties with the succession a few years ago and the growing hostilities with Uraya, I merely wish to suggest that Lady Mòrag take measures to secure the line in some way while His Majesty is still under age. It need not be immediate, it is just a suggestion that I feel is the best course of action."

In the time that Mòrag felt stunned to silence, several members of the Senate murmured their approval of the motion. In that moment, ice crept into her heart. They wanted her to marry. They probably wanted her to marry one of them, even. This wasn't even about succession and the confusion at the death of the previous Emperor, it was just about the potential they had to enhance their position through this.

"No motion in the Senate may dictate a matter like that," his Majesty said. "The personal affairs of Special Inquisitor Ladair are for her to decide. There is no risk of a succession crisis in the near future, unless you wish to doubt the competency of our Special Inquisitor and the army?"

Harret spluttered and merely shook his head before he sat down once more. That was the end of the matter, apparently, as all that remained was a heavy silence. They all wanted to say more, of course. They wanted to argue for her marriage. A marriage explicitly for the sake of producing children. A marriage such as that would take her out of action for months. She could not afford for that to be the case. And regardless, she did not want it.

She sat in sullen silence for the rest of the meeting. Most of it didn't concern her anyway, but she didn't feel like drawing attention to herself again. She still felt sort of frozen and cold inside from the implications of what Senator Harret had said. She didn't think she had even quite processed everything that he wanted or even how she felt. She would probably have to think it through at some point or maybe talk it through with Brighid or she wouldn't be able to articulate herself when the issue came up again. She wanted to be able to defend herself.

"Special Inquisitor, may I speak to you for a moment?" His Majesty spoke to her directly at the adjournment of the meeting, and that just made the pit of nervousness she hadn't even realised was there until now grow larger. She knew what this would be about.

"Of course, your Majesty," she said. They both watched as the chamber quickly emptied. At least the nobles knew when they weren't wanted, that was something. After they were gone, she spoke again. "What did you wish to discuss?"

"I would ask you to ignore the words of Harret and any opinion other Senators have on the issue," he said. "Even if he had a convincing argument, which he didn't, your obligation to the Imperial family is as Special Inquisitor only. Your personal affairs have nothing to do with me."

"I am afraid I must protest," Mòrag said. "I have a duty to the Empire, and if...conceiving was necessary, I would gladly do so to secure his Majesty's lineage."

"No," he said, a note of finality in his tone he rarely used on her. "That is not what you want. It is not long until I myself will have to...perform such a task, as uncomfortable as such a prospect makes me. I know that marriage for the sake of politics would make you unhappy, and that is the last thing I wish."

"But if it is necessary?"

"It is not," he said. "You are free to consider it for as long as you want, but I ask you now to not marry in the immediate future. I'm not sure the imperial coffers can justify a majority coronation and a wedding in the space of a year."

"I understand," she said. She didn't know how to feel about that. She knew her brother was lying about the expense of ceremonies and being able to afford it. Even with the tax reductions they were in a much better position financially than the previous administration. Peace did wonders for the economy. "I thank you for your consideration, your Majesty. I will take your words to heart and not act hastily on the words of a single Senator."

"Your gratitude is appreciated, Special Inquisitor," he said. "Go on, sister, do something that makes you happy for a change." With that, Niall smiled at her with that beautiful bright innocent smile that never seemed to disappear no matter how many slimy senators he had to deal with, and all she could do was smile back, bow to him, and leave the chamber.

Her mind was whirling as she walked back to her rooms. She didn't even know what to think. She could tell that her brother didn't want her to marry just because of something that someone in the Senate said, but he was probably telling her that because at some point, marriage would be necessary. She also knew that while his Majesty always had the final word on measures, he couldn't risk gaining too much unpopularity. While his position was secure for now, that might change when the conditions changed and he needed to protect himself. If that meant she had to get married, she'd suffer it gladly.

"Lady Mòrag?" Brighid was sitting on the sofa in the front rooms of the suite, reading a book. It must be nice not to have to go to Senate meetings. "You look perturbed. How was the Senate meeting?"

"Full of political wranglers shouting at each other like usual," she said with a sigh. "Sometimes it's as if they'd rather argue over every point to enhance their power rather than actually pass motions to benefit the Empire."

“It is a shame,” Brighid said, a sort of thoughtful look on her face. “They have such prominent positions that many people of Alba Cavanich would love to have to use for good, yet all they can use it for is to further their own position.” Mòrag made a quiet noise of agreement and grabbed a book off the shelf before settling down next to Brighid. From there, they fell into comfortable, silent companionship, just as she liked it.

The problem was that no matter how much time she stared at the pages, trying to take the words in, her mind kept drifting back to that suggestion Harret made. She could see the merits and the faults of his view, and she knew her brother’s final verdict on the matter, but...just knowing that the Senate were thinking of her in that way made her skin crawl.

“A Senator suggested I marry,” she said. Brighid jumped, immediately raising her eyes from her book and fixing them on Mòrag’s face. “During the meeting. He said that I should ‘take steps to secure the dynasty’.”

“What did his Majesty say?” Brighid looked even more concerned than she had when she came in. “I trust he did not agree with the Senator, or you would have mentioned this issue sooner.”

“He dismissed the idea immediately,” she said. “And then he told me to pay no heed to the words of one member of the Senate trying to dictate things he had no right to.”  
“Good,” Brighid said. “I...trust that there is some other reason you mentioned it, then, if the matter was resolved so quickly.”

“I can’t stop thinking about it,” she admitted. “I know he wasn’t talking about me choosing someone I liked, but for a brief moment I was thinking about the possibility of all of it, and from then my mind could not cease going round in circles. It’s still going, and I have no answers.”

“What’s the question you are asking?” Brighid had put her book down on the arm of the sofa now, a key indication that she was at least a little concerned about where this conversation was going. She could probably feel the turmoil in Mòrag’s heart right now.

“I was asking myself if I had any desire to marry or have children,” she said. “And I realised I have never once desired either. I have never seen a man and felt inside my heart any form of emotion towards him that could resemble romantic feelings.”

“You are young,” Brighid said. “These feelings come with time, I would say. You do not see children marrying, and you have barely left childhood yourself. I would not feel pressured to have these emotions.”

“I am no longer a child,” she protested. “Many my age have been married for years already. Many claim to have felt love. Some have children, or even two children, at my age. I fear I may never share those feelings that so many others have in common.”

“How about women?” Brighid asked. Mòrag’s heart stilled in her chest. That was the other question she had asked herself, and with Brighid in front of her she did not think she could continue to lie to herself.

“What do you mean?” She asked. Maybe Brighid would leave it. Maybe she could leave this alone and try and never think about it again. Maybe. “What about women?”

“Never-” yes! “No, I think it does matter.” Mòrag’s heart was no longer still; it was beating painfully in her throat. “You say you have never seen a man and felt romantic stirrings in your heart. How about women?”

“I’m- not sure,” she managed. The words felt stuck in her throat. She wanted to speak her mind, say ‘you’, but she couldn’t do it. It was too shameful. To think that she could never provide for the dynasty, her family, as she should...it hurt something in her heart and she did not want to think about it.

“You can say you have, if you have,” Brighid said. “There is no one I am closer to than you; there is no one I would share your answer with against your will.”

“I would like to discuss my true feelings,” Mòrag said. This hurt. It hurt her chest. It felt almost difficult to breathe through the imagined constriction. “But you must swear that no one else will hear of this.”

“Of course, Mòrag,” she said. Mòrag barely even registered the lack of the formal title before she managed a tearful (when had her eyes began to prickle with tears?) reply.

“I...think I may be in love with a woman,” she said. “But I cannot act on it. I cannot marry a woman and I cannot be close in this way to this woman. I know people do it, but in the imperial family...I could not. Especially not with the woman I harbour feelings for.”

“It’s okay, Mòrag,” Brighid said. Vaguely, Mòrag saw her reach out to take her hand. She clung to it gladly. Why had she even admitted it? Now the secret she had been hiding from herself was not only plain to see for herself but also for Brighid. “There is nothing shameful in feelings.”

“It’s- it’s you, Brighid,” she said, and the tears were flowing too strongly for her to continue. She didn’t know why this was so terrifying, she didn’t know why she was so emotional. For a moment, there was silence and stillness and even the link between them held a moment of complete tranquility.

Brighid pulled her hand from Mòrag’s and for a moment, Mòrag was incredibly afraid. But then she felt two warm arms around her waist, and Brighid moved so close that Mòrag felt their clothes brush. “There is no shame in that, Mòrag,” she said firmly. “There is no shame in your feelings, and you shouldn’t feel any despair. Requited love can only be beautiful, and I hope I can convince you of that.”

Soft, warm lips brushed against Mòrag’s own, and she silently vowed that she would never marry some man the Senate picked out for her at some point in the future. The only person worth marrying was already by her side.

**Author's Note:**

> If you enjoyed this, a comment would be greatly appreciated :)


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